Yo Ho Hello and Happy Easter peoples from Hamfruitcake here having just survived the waitressing shift from hell. 11.30am-8.10pm (yes I'm ensuring every minute is in there), no sitting down and three sittings. God worst shift in the world, my feet are crying out and yet here I am and will impart my wisdom to you. You lucky buggers.

Memoria Edit

Don't expect me to be particularly excited about this part. It's the bit where I seriously lose interest and start twiddling my thumbs when my characters are chattering away to each other... Perhaps it's gamers fatigue or this bit of the game just isn't as impressive. Anyhoo let's open our map with select and head to the Iifa Tree to see a big purple glowing ball above it. Enter and an FMV will ensue. Watch Beatrix and the Red Rose kick with the Red Rose. Even though there appears to be a zillion dragons propelling themselves everywhere you only have to fight one.

Boss Box!

Boss Battle : Nova Dragon
Nova Dragon-FFIX
HP: 50 000
Steal: Grand Armour, Dragon Wrist, Remedy.
Attacks Tidal Wave, Aerial Slash, Shockwave, Counter, Psychokinesis.

Shouldn't cause you many problems this guy. Mighty Guard with Quina or Protect and Shell from the girls. Steal your items with Zidane and have your most powerful spells and attacks launched onto it. Regularly keep your HP topped up with White Wind or Curaga and this should be a walk in the park.

It does have another impressive death sequence proving that Dragons in this game have style when it comes to kicking the bucket.

You will now enter a totally new world... which isn't really a world at all but bare with ume. It's a place made of memories. Where it came from or why... well no one really knows but we have to go through it to fight Kuja so deal.

One thing I really dislike about this place is that there are no Moogle save points. Just weird colourful balls of energy. Now who the hell do I cuddle up next to when we pitch our tents? Stupid place... I don't like it! But I'll relent and say the saving thing looks pretty cool. But we shan't be coming back here for a holiday that's for sure. Just wait until you meet the locals.

The monsters here are pretty nasty buggers. You have the Iron Man who seems impervious to everything. The Chimeras who will eat you up and spit you out if you let them. Ensure you have Body Temp switched on for the love of the god. Not only does it really help with Chimeras and other beasties, it'll be very useful during the next boss battles. One thing which isn't worth sniffing over is the amount of EXP you'll be raking in. Switch Level Up on and rake in the extremely good experience as you go. Not that it needs saying just in case you were wondering when a good time to train would be. Just keep battling your way through and you should be a very strong team in no time. Just keep healing Virus with Vaccine promptly.

Go straight ahead to Pendulum Room. Immediately to your left when you go in you'll find a Card Master Phantom who will challenge you to cards. You can win off him Nova Dragons, Alexanders, Hades and Invicibles if you play enough. Also for Card collectors it's a good idea to go through you cards and throw away those you don't need, it goes with out saying to keep at least one of every type but shave down those you don't need. During battles here you will frequently win cards of your foes which saves going out and looking for them that's for sure!

Through the Pendulum Room and up the path around the stairs. It's all pretty linear here. One nice straight line but still I'll guide you. You will find a weapon for Zidane The Tower in an alcove near the top of the stairs. Go into the next screen and run along- uh oh what the?

Boss Battle : Marilis
HP: 60 000
Steal: Masamune, Ultima Sword, Genji Armour.
Attacks Sword Quiver, Reflect, Mustard Bomb, Flame Slash, Raining Swords.

Now you should have heeded my previous advice and have Body Temp switched on for this fight. If you don't. Well I give up. This guy is a firedemon so use some relative common sense when handling him and hit him with non elemental or even ice spells. Beware he will cast reflect so be prepared to bounce your spells of someone else. Anyone with a Rosetta Ring or fire affectionate armour will benefit from his Flame Slash attack so reap the benefits from that.

Common sense applies here, of course you're going to be casting Mighty Guard to start along with a few rounds of White Wind and Curaga to keep everyone topped up. Keep casting Mighty Guard too. Ensure everyone's HP is above 3000 HP to survive his dying attack Raining Swords. Steal the items and make sure you get the Ultima Sword as it teaches Steiner Stock Break. I know he has much better stuff now!! But still!

In the next room we get a view of Alexandria castle with a romantic pink sky which turns into it's incineration. Everyone jumps except for Quina who doesn't seem to have noticed the explosions. Well he wasn't there so he doesn't remember. Of course! That makes perfect sense! Examine the ruined castle to find the Angel Flute on the left and save point on the right. Phew! Save and Tent up!

Next room will have a spiral staircase and floaty things... strange... Run up to the next room which involves a storm. Over the bridge to see some people getting on a boat. Dagger will get confused that Zidane is seeing her own personal memories. She shares this with him promptly, Garland responds to Zidane's yelling and we move on.

Next up an eye in the sky with a stairway heading up to it. Garland puts his two cents in and then you can head up the stairs for another boss.

Boss Battle : Tiamat
HP: 60 000
Steal: Grand Helm, Feather Boots, Blood Sword.
Attacks Jet Fire, Magic Absorb, Absorb Strength, Absorb MP, Silent Claw, Twister.

Not as difficult as his predecessor, which isn't saying much. Don't even both stealing from this guy. His items are pretty paltry as are his attacks. Mighty Guard and White Wind every couple of rounds should keep everyone happy. Just pummel it with strong physicals and non elemental spells. Should fall in next to no time. Easy!

Up through the eye in the sky!

Nothing of interest in this room. Just run up the stairs to the next one. I have The Maccabees second album playing at the minute. It's pretty good listening, not as chirpy as their previous but still pretty cool stuff. I love their first single track Love you Better. Great song... God am I bored... Moving on!

In the next room at the bottom of the stairs is a jar who you can challenge to cards to win some very decent cards off. Holy Leviathan, Twin Moons, Lindblum, Alexandria, Meteor and Flare to name a few! Leave to the left and head up the shiny see through staircase into the next room. Off you go. In the next room we'll have a vision of two planets apparrently merging. Weird. Run along the path into the next room. Brad Pitt should totally stop being an idiot and get a bloody shave! What's wrong with him! My attentions are totally being diverted back to George Clooney who is even older than Pitt and all because of that sodding beard. Doesn't matter what day of the week... or decade... I'd still have Clooney. God how sexy is that man?

Next room has a save sphere, thank god! Rest up and Save and head through the waterfall. In the next room there is finally something worth seeing. Quina have a swim in mid air. Haha! That guy is brilliant. How he's doing it is beyond me. He likes the fishies, then Zidane comes in and ruins it. Quina suddenly decides he can't breathe, but wait he can! Comedy genius Qu with us we'll never get bored! Unfortunately all the fish disappear along with Quina's fantasy. Shame! Watch out as there are a new batch of beasties in here to fight. You'll have Red Scorpions and the scary Behemoth... They shouldn't cause you many problems just a heads up really. Now while you're in this room before you leave head right past the stairs into a hidden bit of the screen. Run around blind clicking X trying to aim for the big whale looking rock. A mysterious voice asks you to leave. You've got bigger balls than that I hope.

Optional Boss Battle : Hades
HP: 60 000
Steal: Robe of Lords, Battle Boots, Running Shoes, Reflect Ring.
Attacks Reflect, Freeze, Cleave, Judgement Sword (Reduces HP to 1), Mustard Bomb, Curse (Confuse, Blind, Mini), Doomsday.

I assume you have Body Temp on from all those other battles and just left it on. Otherwise if you took all the effort to go and turn it off... Well you're a fool! A fool I say! Hades loves to use Freeze and Mustard Bomb, don't say I didn't warn you. Cleave hits your party for about 2000 HP and Judgement Sword lowers one party member's HP to 1 HP so quickly heal up with Curaga and Elixirs at this point.

Sooner or later he'll start powering up his sword in preparation for his first Curse and you'll have a countdown from 3. Ensure you have protection against Confuse Blind and remedy Mini and deal with these effects quickly. Keep hammering away at him. Heal up quickly and when his countdown starts again he's powering up Doomsday which will inflict about 5000 HP damage on your entire party. Yikes. Hope for Trances and take chances (heh rhymes...) and pummel him before this happens. If you really must steal you must be bloody confident.

Shock, and any of Steiner's Sword arts inflict healthy amounts of damage, Bahumut and Madeen are also reliable. He will cast reflect on himself so counter this with reflect on the mages to use Flare and Holy for consistent damage. Zidane's usual attacks and Dyne abilities are effective here. Quina should be used for Mighty Guard and consistent rounds of White Wind. After the battle you get a whopping amount of EXP too! Good times!

After the battle Hades will commend you and claim if you take 2 Pumice Pieces to him he will synthesise someting only he can create. Sounds impressive. If you have them go right ahead, it creates the Pumice which allows Dagger to summon the most powerful Eidolon Ark. What do you bloody mean you didn't do the Choco sidequest? After all that sodding effort I put into it?

At Hades synthesis shop you can also get aside from the Pumice, Tin Armour and Robe of Lords which are always handy to have. The Hammer if you recieved it from Stella can you be used to either create the Tin Armour or split the Pumice back into two pieces if you need them later (which you might). But if you keep the Hammer in your inventory I keep getting told there is an extra bit in the ending. I've done it but I've never seen it to be honest. You can also create your very own Save the Queen which can not be equipped to anyone and is only really suitable for throwing. For that amount of money and effort it's not worth it. Especially letting sodding Amarant handle it. It'll be Beatrix's toy forever.

Ok I'm bored now. All these boss boxes. It's almost a not fun page! I'm off!


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